Please release me

More information: Hamish Thompson 07702 684290 @HamishMThompson


The Boring Conference, scheduled to take place at Conway Hall at 10am in central London this Saturday, will feature talks on East German pedestrian crossing signals, paper bags, lamp posts, Toilet roll quality control codes, small words and bricks. There will be other talks but in the interests of concision a decision has been taken to abbreviate the list of talks at this point in the first paragraph because add further detail would give the game away and might cause the recipient to lose interest. Furthermore, adding extra details of talks in the first paragraph might make the attendee who has paid good money to come to the event feel that the surprise factor has been diminished somewhat, a phenomenon youngsters refer to as a spoiler, which in turn might create a bit of an atmosphere at the event. Also, according to the Dummies’ Guide to PR, chapter 3, paragraph one, sentence 2, “the first paragraph should be punchy and to the point, hooking the reader in”. The chapter also explains that curtailing the content a bit enables the reader to get to the quote from the organiser which traditionally forms the second paragraph.

James Ward, organiser, said: “I am pleased that we are once again hosting this event at Conway Hall in central London. It is, of course, the 22nd anniversary of the recovery of  Edvard Munch’s iconic painting The Scream undamaged after being stolen from the National Gallery of Norway. My assistant said to me while were stapling the agendas together that she thought it might be quite a nice idea to pay homage. Quick as a flash I suggested that we invite the audience to imitate the scream from their seats. ‘Yes, let’s see how long that lasts’, she replied encouragingly.”

A number of press passes are available for boredom aficionados in the media who would prefer to avoid taking money from touts outside the venue.

– Enough – 

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